Free Read Is Up!

I've been working on a free read project for awhile, now, and finally have it up on the website! Cover art is awesome, and by the talented Dara England.



Blurb:

Darcy Abrams is consumed by grief. Losing her husband eight months before, her life has been reduced to long days filled with work and loneliness. What sleep she does snatch is plagued by nightmares. When one last bad dream pushes her to her breaking point, a visit from her dead husband, Eric, almost convinces her she’s finally gone crazy. But Eric brings a revelation that turns her entire world inside out. Can his promise of forever surpass even death itself?


PDF can be downloaded here. Enjoy!

Life's Lessons

I've had a bad case of the blahs recently.

There's stress at my day job, frustration with the economy, issues with money. I'm kind of a tired mess.

But this won't be a "poor me" blog. It's a kick in the butt to myself. (Is that even possible?)

When I get to feeling sorry for myself, I remember the best and brightest person in my life - my Grandmother Gertrude.

Gram was the strongest, most giving person I have ever known. She was widowed at a young age and raised five children on her own cleaning houses. The "down on your hands and knees" kind of cleaning. She taught me that you always had to work hard for what you wanted, and that made you appreciate it even more.

She had a temper and was very particular about certain things, which my Mother says I inherited. But Gram loved her family, and would do anything at all without hesitation to help us. I literally saw her give up all that she had on more than one occasion, because she thought someone else needed it more than she did. And she never expected anything in return. That kind of unconditional love spoke volumes about her.

She helped raise me as a child, then spoiled me when Mom moved us away. We would have slumber parties with soap operas and stay up all night reading romance novels in bed. We would talk for hours and laugh until tears flowed down our cheeks. You never needed much to have a good time with Gram. She found joy in the simplest things.

When I grew up, she was still always there with loads of support. Whenever I needed her, she would make sure to be there, arms wide open, without question. She made me feel safe, loved, and like I could do anything. There was never an ounce of disappointment in her eyes.

Gram died from cancer April 15, 2005. She fought her battle bravely, just like she did everything. And though she's no longer with me in this world, I feel her presence when I most need it. (which happens to be often)

I still miss her fiercely, but through her eyes I could always see the person I wanted to be. What she taught me remains in my heart forever and spurs me onward.

She would have been so excited and proud to see my first novel published.




And then she would have said "now buckle down and do it again!"

...I'm off to write...

Learning To Let Go...

I visited with my sister today. She stopped by on her way to San Antonio, Texas, where she is moving to be closer to her boyfriend. This might not seem like a big deal to most people, but it is for me.

You see, she's my baby sister - ten years younger than me. I also have a brother that's fourteen years younger than me. I helped raise them, and spent alot of my adolescence changing diapers, giving baths, reading stories, making meals, and babysitting.

My relationship with my siblings has always been more parental than big sister. So even though I do not have children of my own, I consider them my kids.

It is because of that bond that I've always been very protective of them. Even when I moved out and started a life of my own, I always came back for holidays, sent gifts, and made sure I made it home to celebrate their birthdays.

So when my sister told me she was moving to Texas, I kind of freaked out. All that went through my head was a million reasons why it was a bad idea. Our family has never really been more than two or three hours apart. EVER.

But then I got to thinking. She's 24. I moved away to college when I was 18. I got married and moved again when I was 22. No one tried to talk me out of any part of it. And I'm glad - because I learned to depend on myself and create my own life.

Yet here I was, working to convince my sister to stay put - to take the "safe" route, when she obviously wasn't happy, or she wouldn't be thinking of leaving in the first place.

And then it hit me. All that talk that parents spout about learning to let go of their kids, and how it hurts to see them stand on their two feet, even though that's what you raise them to do their whole lives, suddenly made sense.

I was being selfish. She was ready to start a life of her own - and I had to let her, no matter how much it hurt.

So when she called to tell me she was stopping by on her way through, I told her to disregard everything I'd said earlier. If this was what she wanted, then she should go for it and make the most wonderful life she could. I would always be here for her if she needed me.

She sounded the happiest I've ever heard her, and that happiness continued to when I got to see her today.

They say letting go of the one you love is one of the truest expressions of love there is.

And when she hugged me goodbye on my doorstep, a little piece of my heart went with her as I let her go.

Love never ceases to teach me things as I get older.