I'm a nice person. (Mostly) And a friendly person. (Usually) I work face to face with the public daily, so I keep my snarkiness in check and plaster on a smile so wide my face hurts most days. I make small talk. I help customers. I'm very good at my job.
But would someone please tell me why there are people out there who have this urge to share more than is really necessary during these typically brief encounters?
For example - When asking me for help in finding a photo frame - I expect the occasional story about grandkids, or family life. That's a given. But I've had people go on and on, their mouths running like leaky faucets about divorces, surgeries, affairs, diseases, deaths-there seems to be no end.
Do I really need to hear about your knee surgery and actually see your scar to help you find a frame?
Do I need you to spend fifteen minutes telling me about your neighbor's affair and subsequent divorce to direct you to the silk flowers?
Do I have to know what happened the past six months of your life in order to recommend a good craft paint for wood?
I REALLY think not.
Have we become a society so devoid of emotional contact with others that we have to find a captive audience and pour out the intimate details of our lives to strangers that we've known all of thirty seconds?
WHAT is up with that?
Just the other day, my coworker helped a man fit a poster into a frame. At the end of the transaction, the man decides to share that rainy days make him horny. I hardly think that's appropriate conversation.
A simple "thank you for helping me" would suffice nicely, don't you think?
But again, maybe it's just me.
Sunday, November 22, 2009
Saturday, November 21, 2009
Retail Rant Revisited - Episode Three - The Horrors Of Glitter Lung
One day about three years ago, now, I arrived at work like usual. It was the start of the peak holiday season for us, (which means it was sometime in October.) I was working with Jon that day. Jon's a great guy - a very talented artist - but not very talkative. It was like pulling teeth to get him to speak sometimes.
But that never stopped me from trying.
Determined to always make the best of every situation, my mind raced for things I could try to talk about with him. I looked down and saw my slacks sparkling in the light.
"Now how in the world do I already have glitter on me? I just got here!" I brushed my slacks off in vain. "I swear, this stuff is everywhere this time of year!"
Jon looked across the table at me evenly, his expression unfaltering. "I think everyone who works here is going to die of Glitter Lung." Jon looked back down and resumed his work, as if his statement was something said every day.
I stared at him, open-mouthed. First, because he spoke without having been asked a direct question. Second, because he hardly ever tried to make a joke.
The giggles were coming. I felt them churning in my gut, clawing their way to the surface. I knew once they escaped, they wouldn't stop for awhile.
You see, in my store, EVERYTHING sparkles for the holidays - Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas most of all. Glitter adorns the silk flower bushes, the stems, the made arrangements, the ornaments, the wreaths, the stockings, anything and everything you can think of shimmers with the stuff.
And so, my co-workers and I shimmer with the stuff as well. We get it on our hands, our clothes, our shoes, our hair - nothing escapes the sparkly stuff during peak season. We track it home with us, so it invades our cars, our carpets, our laundry baskets. My poor husband glimmers almost as much as I do every year.
We make the best of it at work. Everyone is resigned to shimmery sheik for peak season. Glitter fights have been known to ensue. We've even swept it up in piles and saved it for future use.
We make our own fun.
Jon has since moved on to better and brighter things, but I'll always remember his observation about Glitter Lung, and how he stared at me in confusion while I struggled to breathe through my laughter. I shared his statment with everyone else at the store.
Needless to say, Peak season is now always Glitter Lung season.
Thanks Jon.
But that never stopped me from trying.
Determined to always make the best of every situation, my mind raced for things I could try to talk about with him. I looked down and saw my slacks sparkling in the light.
"Now how in the world do I already have glitter on me? I just got here!" I brushed my slacks off in vain. "I swear, this stuff is everywhere this time of year!"
Jon looked across the table at me evenly, his expression unfaltering. "I think everyone who works here is going to die of Glitter Lung." Jon looked back down and resumed his work, as if his statement was something said every day.
I stared at him, open-mouthed. First, because he spoke without having been asked a direct question. Second, because he hardly ever tried to make a joke.
The giggles were coming. I felt them churning in my gut, clawing their way to the surface. I knew once they escaped, they wouldn't stop for awhile.
You see, in my store, EVERYTHING sparkles for the holidays - Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas most of all. Glitter adorns the silk flower bushes, the stems, the made arrangements, the ornaments, the wreaths, the stockings, anything and everything you can think of shimmers with the stuff.
And so, my co-workers and I shimmer with the stuff as well. We get it on our hands, our clothes, our shoes, our hair - nothing escapes the sparkly stuff during peak season. We track it home with us, so it invades our cars, our carpets, our laundry baskets. My poor husband glimmers almost as much as I do every year.
We make the best of it at work. Everyone is resigned to shimmery sheik for peak season. Glitter fights have been known to ensue. We've even swept it up in piles and saved it for future use.
We make our own fun.
Jon has since moved on to better and brighter things, but I'll always remember his observation about Glitter Lung, and how he stared at me in confusion while I struggled to breathe through my laughter. I shared his statment with everyone else at the store.
Needless to say, Peak season is now always Glitter Lung season.
Thanks Jon.
Friday, November 20, 2009
Retail Rant Revisited - Episode Two - What Month Is It Anyway?
Ever since I started my career in retail, my sense of time has become a little...skewed. The retail calendar differs greatly from the calendar that most people follow.
A great deal of the product in my store is seasonal, and switches out rapidly from one season and holiday to the next. This is to be expected, but our timeframe for such things is slightly different from how we live. Therefore, I constantly find myself in a conflicting set of environments.
You see, when everyone is celebrating winter and Christmas, my store is putting out the spring, Valentine's Day, and Easter items. Barely into spring, the summer flowers flood our sales floor, along with all the kid crafts that parents seek out to keep the little ones busy while out of school. Summer is usually when fall and winter start to rear their heads, pumpkins and santas piling into the store at an alarming rate.
Before retail, I couldn't imagine anyone needing to buy Christmas decorations in the summer. But sure enough, customers flock to our doors, asking for the ornaments and giftwrap before the school year even starts.
Why?
Don't we spend enough time commercializing each holiday already? Do we really need to drag everything out months and months in advance?
Not to mention the confusion it causes those of us that deal with this juxtaposition daily. Smelling Christmas Pine candles and listening to the animated santas all day, then stepping out into warm September weather is a bit of a shock sometimes. Not ot mention how utterly fed up with the holidays we retails workers get because of having to stare at the stuff months longer than necessary.
I used to decorate for every single holiday. My mother always made sure our house reflected every celebration - no matter how small. But as each year passes, I find that I care less and less, and my Easter bunnies, fall leaves, pumpkins, ornaments, etc. never make it out of their dark homes in the garage. I just can't seem to face them at home as well as at work.
It's almost as if the constant exposure has made me desensitized to the effects the holiday items have on other people. I no longer "ooh" and "ahh" over things like I did years ago.
Instead, my retail-muddled brain thinks:
We're putting out Christmas flowers? Must be August.
A great deal of the product in my store is seasonal, and switches out rapidly from one season and holiday to the next. This is to be expected, but our timeframe for such things is slightly different from how we live. Therefore, I constantly find myself in a conflicting set of environments.
You see, when everyone is celebrating winter and Christmas, my store is putting out the spring, Valentine's Day, and Easter items. Barely into spring, the summer flowers flood our sales floor, along with all the kid crafts that parents seek out to keep the little ones busy while out of school. Summer is usually when fall and winter start to rear their heads, pumpkins and santas piling into the store at an alarming rate.
Before retail, I couldn't imagine anyone needing to buy Christmas decorations in the summer. But sure enough, customers flock to our doors, asking for the ornaments and giftwrap before the school year even starts.
Why?
Don't we spend enough time commercializing each holiday already? Do we really need to drag everything out months and months in advance?
Not to mention the confusion it causes those of us that deal with this juxtaposition daily. Smelling Christmas Pine candles and listening to the animated santas all day, then stepping out into warm September weather is a bit of a shock sometimes. Not ot mention how utterly fed up with the holidays we retails workers get because of having to stare at the stuff months longer than necessary.
I used to decorate for every single holiday. My mother always made sure our house reflected every celebration - no matter how small. But as each year passes, I find that I care less and less, and my Easter bunnies, fall leaves, pumpkins, ornaments, etc. never make it out of their dark homes in the garage. I just can't seem to face them at home as well as at work.
It's almost as if the constant exposure has made me desensitized to the effects the holiday items have on other people. I no longer "ooh" and "ahh" over things like I did years ago.
Instead, my retail-muddled brain thinks:
We're putting out Christmas flowers? Must be August.
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Retail Rant Revisited - Episode One
I originally posted these rants on my Myspace blog last year, and have decided to post them again, and add a few things, since we are heading toward the peak retail season.
I think they're funny, and well, this is my blog, so I can do what I want!
Though I am trying to establish myself as an author, I do have a day-today job that I must have to pay the bills (especially in this economic climate). Since February of 1999, I have worked in the retail business for a large arts and crafts chain, predominately in art framing.
Almost ten years of experience in this area has been eye-opening for sure. When you deal with the public daily, you hone your observational skills and become witness to things you never ever expected to see. And you hear things you never wanted to hear.
I've dealt with people at their best, but more often, people at their worst. To be honest, I never really expected to be doing this job for so long. But I have collected MANY thoughts and experiences.
I often toyed with the idea of putting some of these things into a book. Since I already have a dozen book projects in the works, I decided that I will just hit the high points over a few blogs. I will share my rants, my WTF moments, and anything else I can think of.
Maybe through some humor, I can brace myself for possibly the worst peak season in retail I've ever had.
So sit back, read, laugh, and shake your head in disbelief. I promise - it's all true.
I think they're funny, and well, this is my blog, so I can do what I want!
Though I am trying to establish myself as an author, I do have a day-today job that I must have to pay the bills (especially in this economic climate). Since February of 1999, I have worked in the retail business for a large arts and crafts chain, predominately in art framing.
Almost ten years of experience in this area has been eye-opening for sure. When you deal with the public daily, you hone your observational skills and become witness to things you never ever expected to see. And you hear things you never wanted to hear.
I've dealt with people at their best, but more often, people at their worst. To be honest, I never really expected to be doing this job for so long. But I have collected MANY thoughts and experiences.
I often toyed with the idea of putting some of these things into a book. Since I already have a dozen book projects in the works, I decided that I will just hit the high points over a few blogs. I will share my rants, my WTF moments, and anything else I can think of.
Maybe through some humor, I can brace myself for possibly the worst peak season in retail I've ever had.
So sit back, read, laugh, and shake your head in disbelief. I promise - it's all true.
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
What I'm Thankful For
Thanksgiving is almost here. The time where everyone is supposed to stop and take a moment to count their blessings.
With the stress of everyday living these days, I find it increasingly difficult to stop and smell the roses. This time of year is especially hectic in my retail day job. Longer hours, looming deadlines. More to do and less time to do it.
But at least I have a job to be stressed over. So many people don't even have that right now. Even when I want to pull my hair out, I make myself stop and take some deep breaths, because not having this job would give me a whole new set of problems.
Having a full time job with a commute does make the process of being a prolific writer a tad difficult, though. My time is very limited outside of work. And my husband has a multitude of health problems that keep us busy going to the doctor.
Despite all this, I know I'm blessed. I have a job. I have a home. I have a wonderful husband who's been madly in love with me since we were seventeen years old. I found a great publisher who believes in me and my work (when I can get it done-LOL) And through them, I have a fabulous group of author friends who keep me somewhat sane and definitely laughing.
And I'm thankful for readers who buy and read my books. Just today, I looked and found that my first release, Second Chances, is #2 on Sapphire Blue's contemporary list, and Summon Me Swiftly is #4 in the Romance/Erotic category.
I really do have alot to be thankful for!
With the stress of everyday living these days, I find it increasingly difficult to stop and smell the roses. This time of year is especially hectic in my retail day job. Longer hours, looming deadlines. More to do and less time to do it.
But at least I have a job to be stressed over. So many people don't even have that right now. Even when I want to pull my hair out, I make myself stop and take some deep breaths, because not having this job would give me a whole new set of problems.
Having a full time job with a commute does make the process of being a prolific writer a tad difficult, though. My time is very limited outside of work. And my husband has a multitude of health problems that keep us busy going to the doctor.
Despite all this, I know I'm blessed. I have a job. I have a home. I have a wonderful husband who's been madly in love with me since we were seventeen years old. I found a great publisher who believes in me and my work (when I can get it done-LOL) And through them, I have a fabulous group of author friends who keep me somewhat sane and definitely laughing.
And I'm thankful for readers who buy and read my books. Just today, I looked and found that my first release, Second Chances, is #2 on Sapphire Blue's contemporary list, and Summon Me Swiftly is #4 in the Romance/Erotic category.
I really do have alot to be thankful for!
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Lots Going On!
It's been a truly hectic couple of weeks for me! I have lots going on, which I'd like to share with you!
First, my new erotic short story, Summon Me Swiftly, is out at Sapphire Blue Publishing!
After a disappointing night fending off drunk suitors at her friend’s Halloween party, Amanda Swift is completely disenchanted with the dating scene. She’s even more fed up with being alone, and wishes she’d finally find that perfect guy to sweep her off her feet and make her toes curl with ecstasy. But Amanda’s evening quickly switches gears when she walks into her bedroom and discovers a very handsome — and very naked—hunk, who wants to please her in every way. But is this a case of be careful what you wish for?
I really enjoyed working on this story, and have plans for more fun short stories in the future. It was aslo a hoot to write spicier than I normally do. Of course, I had to pair it with alot of sarcastic humor as well!
In other news, I now have a book trailer for my first release, Second Chances. The fabulous people at www.scarletv.com held a contest, and I won! They were a pleasure to work with, and I'm sure I will use their services in the future. Have a look!
It's been a whirlwind couple of weeks, but I'm having a blast on the ride!
And on a final note - Happy Veteran's Day to all the men and women who work/have worked to keep us and our country safe!
First, my new erotic short story, Summon Me Swiftly, is out at Sapphire Blue Publishing!
After a disappointing night fending off drunk suitors at her friend’s Halloween party, Amanda Swift is completely disenchanted with the dating scene. She’s even more fed up with being alone, and wishes she’d finally find that perfect guy to sweep her off her feet and make her toes curl with ecstasy. But Amanda’s evening quickly switches gears when she walks into her bedroom and discovers a very handsome — and very naked—hunk, who wants to please her in every way. But is this a case of be careful what you wish for?
I really enjoyed working on this story, and have plans for more fun short stories in the future. It was aslo a hoot to write spicier than I normally do. Of course, I had to pair it with alot of sarcastic humor as well!
In other news, I now have a book trailer for my first release, Second Chances. The fabulous people at www.scarletv.com held a contest, and I won! They were a pleasure to work with, and I'm sure I will use their services in the future. Have a look!
It's been a whirlwind couple of weeks, but I'm having a blast on the ride!
And on a final note - Happy Veteran's Day to all the men and women who work/have worked to keep us and our country safe!
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
New Cover Art!
Well, I told you guys I was working on a short story with Sapphire Blue Publishing, and last night, I got an email with my cover art in it!
Take a gander!
Blurb:
After a disappointing night fending off drunk suitors at her friend’s Halloween party, Amanda Swift is completely disenchanted with the dating scene. She’s even more fed up with being alone, and wishes she’d finally find that perfect guy to sweep her off her feet and make her toes curl with ecstasy. But Amanda’s evening quickly switches gears when she walks into her bedroom and discovers a very handsome –and very naked— hunk who wants to please her in every way. You really do have to be careful what you wish for…
The release date might be as soon as next week, but I'll be sure to let you guys know when I know for sure.
It's a fun, snarky, sexy story that was a blast to write! I hope everyone has as much fun reading it as I had writing it!
Take a gander!
Blurb:
After a disappointing night fending off drunk suitors at her friend’s Halloween party, Amanda Swift is completely disenchanted with the dating scene. She’s even more fed up with being alone, and wishes she’d finally find that perfect guy to sweep her off her feet and make her toes curl with ecstasy. But Amanda’s evening quickly switches gears when she walks into her bedroom and discovers a very handsome –and very naked— hunk who wants to please her in every way. You really do have to be careful what you wish for…
The release date might be as soon as next week, but I'll be sure to let you guys know when I know for sure.
It's a fun, snarky, sexy story that was a blast to write! I hope everyone has as much fun reading it as I had writing it!
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